Back in 1997 teenage girls around the world all simultaneously slammed their platformed selves to the left in a united ‘Spice Up Your Life’ celebration for the Spice Girls first and only feature film, Spice World.
It was one year before the artist formerly known as Ginger Spice left the band (breaking hearts in the process), and those five girls were in their element. The outfits were great, the songs were great, those ‘Leader of the Gang’ dancers with their satin-clad bum cheeks out were great, that Union Jack bus with a swing-set inside was great…all in all, the movie was GREAT.
Of course the Spice Girls were so much more to fans than outfits, buses and butt cheeks and, speaking as a girl whose Granddad recorded every TV appearance these five chicks had so I could them watch on repeat, I could blather on for days about all things ’90s Girl Power, but I won’t.
However, because of Viva Forever and all that, I will inject a little long lost ’90s spice into your life now, because you look like you need it. So, if it’s been a while since you plonked yourselves down before the box and watched Spice World the movie, the film which follows the girl band as they zip around London in a double decker tour bus — here are a few reminders why you should change that, pronto.
1. “My mummy’s my best friend…shhh!”
First up, and probably most obviously, that time they dressed up as each other and majorly — to borrow a British phrase — take the piss.
And yes, before you ask, that is Dominic West from The Wire.
2. The Spice Memories!
Call me old fashioned and sentimental, but “we’ve got this new song”…<3333
3. Boots, Bears and Black Gucci Dresses
Actually it’s more about the bus, but I felt like I was talking about it too much. Seriously though, how cool is the personalized interior?! They all get separate areas and it’s HUGE. I’d move in today, tbh.
4. “Strength and courage in a Wonderbra”
They all go to dance boot camp which is lead by a dementedly brilliant “Mother” (and he “doesn’t mean Superior”) in the shape of British TV comedian, Michael Barrymore.
“Left, right, left, right, wooo. Don’t give me any of that Julie Andrews high on a hill type clap trap.”
5. Their general view on motherhood
Featuring Victoria Beckham wearing Chanel, sat in the corner with rollers in her hair and a fat Mel C in a shell suit, sitting on a treadmill waxing lyrical about her sons aspirations.
6. Spice Force Five!
A movie pitch for ‘Spice Force Five,’ in which each girl is clad in silver spandex and given a super power. Baby Spice, the martial arts expert. Sporty Spice, the counter espionage agent. Scary Spice, the explosives expert. Ginger Spice, the master of disguise. And Posh Spice, who just stands between two cars and makes cat noises.
7. That time they almost delivered their friend’s baby on a bus while wearing rubber gloves…
…and it ended up with Victoria yelling at a kid in a coma.
8. When Geri and Mel B try to play chess
And Scary literally gives zero fucks.
9. That time Mel B has her boob squeezed by an Alien
Just some casual super-fans from outer space, trying to grab some gig tickets, pinch a boob and steal a kiss from Geri. No biggie.
10. ALL the cameos / What do you think about Manta Rays?
Hugh Laurie, Elton John, Bob Hoskins, Richard E. Grant, Stephen Fry, Bob Geldof, Roger Moore, Jonathan Ross, Jennifer Saunders, Dominic West… just to name a few!