Sure, there are many people out there like the Pope and the Dalai Lama who proclaim they have the answer for any situation, but have they ever ninja-smuggled a shit over the New York roof-scape? I doubt it.
I to deliver an on point reaction GIF, screw those fusty old dudes and look no further than the insurmountable wisdom of the wisest jewesses in the hood. You deserve it.
1. When The Hottest Guy In The Universe Appears And You Message Your Friend Across The Bar
That’s what friends are for, right? It might seem ambiguous, but a true friend will totally get it, especially if accompanied with the ever expressive winky face and an informative arrow. Also
2. When Someone Sends You A Crappy Spotify Playlist And You’re Too Embarrassed To Use Real Words
Because overenthusiastic crop-hoody Ilana is always better than the bitter truth. Dope tunes, y’all!
3. When You Ate The Leftovers You Know Your BFF Was Saving For Breakfast In A Blazed Haze
One sorry isn’t enough for those moments when you’ve turned into your biggest love’s biggest hate.
4. When Your BFF Says She Isn’t Drinking This Weekend
Seriously, get that Goop shit right out of my grill, even Gwyneth herself is bored of it by now.
5. When You Want To Pay Your Respects To A Burger So Fearsome That You Can Feel It Congealing In Your Arteries Like The All-American Hard-Ass It Is
Real talk. Can a burger be a kween?
6. When That Asshole Who Bullied You In High School Adds You On Facebook And You Realize Karma Is Real
Feel this blissful caress of sweet, sweet justice enveloping you like an entire evening
7. When You Want To Show Your BFF What Their Crunk-Ass Dancing Looked Like Last Night
Sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind. We’ve all been there, boo.
8. When Someone Say JIF In A Meeting And A Piece Of Your Soul Withers And Dies
You know that song “It’s Not Right But It’s Okay?” It’s a little known fact that it was actually written about the GIF with a G pronunciation. You do you.
9. When You Blast A Joint You’re Rolling Across The Room With A Tragically Mistimed Sneeze
I remember each and every one one of you sweet, green soldiers who never had their chance to shine. R.I.P.
10. When They Call Last Orders In The Bar And You’re So Not Ready
Eat my tequila flavored dust, bitchesssssssss.
11. When You’re Not Shameless Enough To Post A Gym Selfie But You Really Wanna
Sometimes only gym Ilana has what it takes to save you from becoming one of those people.
12. When Drunk You Masters The Art Of Subtle, Sophisticated Flirtation
Move over Don Juan, I got this.
13. When You’re A Parent And Someone Says ‘Remember You’re A Mom Now’ To Kill Your Vibe
You might have taken my sleep, but you will never take my FREEEEEEEEDOM!
14. When That Arid Dry Spell Is Getting To Much To Handle
Sometimes only Ilana’s legendary penis thirst can summarize the depths of your feeling when your sex life becomes as barren and endless as the Sahara desert.
15. When Someone Is Being A Dick In Group Chat So You PM Your BFF
If you can’t stand behind their back and make a jerk-off sign, you might as well do it digitally.
16. When You Decide To Go To ‘The Red Pill’ To See How Terrible The Ignorant Mouth-Breathers There Really Are
Try not to bite through your tongue, you’ll need it to lash them when you meet them IRL.
17. When Your Annoying Colleague Tries To Speak To You Before 11:30 am
Or ever, tbh.
18. When Your Selfie Game Is On Point
Don’t hate me ‘cus I’m beautiful.
19. When You Try A Kylie Jenner Makeup Tutorial
We just have different bone structures, okay?!
20. When Someone Asks You If You Want Pizza
I’d put a ring on it if it didn’t keep slipping off.
21. When Someone Asks You To Peg Them But You Secretly Wanna
Oh RLY?! 😉
22. When you Wake Up To 50 Messages Illumating What Happened During Last Night’s Blackout
Take comfort from the fact you’re not the first person to dry hump a flat screen TV and you won’t be last.
23. ‘You’re Pretty, You Should Smile’
The only appropriate reaction. Period.
24. When Your Vegan Friend Gets A Bit Too Eco With Their Aversion To Packaging
Yeah, but can you put your weekly shop in there? NO.
25. When Someone Insists You Eat Finger Food With A Knife And Fork
And they have to nerve to imply YOU’RE the savage?!
26. When You’re Playing Devil’s Advocate And Loving It
We are all Bingo Bronson.
27. When You Over Do It On The Edibles
It’s not my fault the universe is so freakin’ amazing.
28. Whenever You’re With Your Kweens
Sometimes life is just one long, beautiful YASSSSSSSSSSSS.
What’s your favorite Broad City moment? Add to the GIF library below and share the love!