More Like “FAIL HYDRA!” – All the Times Captain America Was Legitimately the Worst Hydra Agent Ever!

You had ONE JOB, Steve. And you blew it.

First up, those 200+ times he fake KO’d Hitler (and the time he ACTUALLY KO’d Hitler)

Yes, we all know Steve wasn’t REALLY punching Hitler in this context, but still, it’s the principle. I mean have some decency, Steve. Even if you’re a terrorist, you can’t just go around slugging your bosses’ boss all willy-nilly. And then, to add insult to injury, there was that time that he actually KO’d the REAL Hitler.

Ooh, bet THAT mission report didn't go so hot.

Ooh, bet THAT mission report didn’t go so hot.

Now, I’m no rocket scientist, but something tells me that clobbering “der Fuhrer” isn’t exactly exemplary Nazi behavior. Oh, but Steve’s Hydra-wrecking antics don’t end there. Not by a long shot. Next up?Captain America single-handedly lost WWII for Hydra

Red Skull's death at the hand of Cap...sort of

Red Skull’s death at the hand of Cap…sort of

Remember who the last person to see Red Skull alive was? That’s right. Steve Rogers. And during WWII, who was the very ugly public face of Hydra? Red Skull. And when Red Skull disappears after a battle with Cap… let’s just say it’s not improving his performance rating with the higher-ups at Hydra. I’m sure Steve had fun explaining THAT encounter. “What do you MEAN you ‘accidentally killed’ Red Skull?!” But wait! Cap’s Hydra career went downhill from there!That time he forced Hydra out of hiding and un-brainwashed the Winter Soldier

You forced our hand, Captain
You forced our hand, Captain

Yeah, so the whole “SHIELD-has-been-a-HYDRA-cover-for-70-years-and-nobody-noticed-until-you-shouted-it-over-all-the-SHIELD-comm-channels” fiasco? That one’s totally on Steve.

And don’t think Hydra forgot about him breaking their brainwashing of the Winter Soldier either. I imagine he and Zemo had a talk about that and Cap probably didn’t like the outcome of the conversation. But, perhaps the biggest blight on Steve’s Hydra service record?He wiped out or imprisoned at least five major Hydra leaders

Nice going, there, Captain

Nice going, there, Captain

Let’s see here. Red Skull died back in 1941, and Steve was the last to see him alive. Zola “died” of a terminal illness and then died again due to an explosion specifically targeting, you guessed it, Steve Rogers. Alexander Pierce wasn’t directly killed by Steve, but was killed because Steve blew the whistle on the HYDRA moles within SHIELD, blowing Pierce’s cover in doing so. Strucker was originally only captured by Steve Rogers, though later killed by Ultron. And Zemo is incarcerated following the aftermath of Captain America: Civil War. Things really aren’t looking so hot for Steve’s promotion chances at Hydra. But what do you guys think? Is Captain America REALLY a Hydra agent? And if he is, is he REALLY the worst ever at his job?